What Are We Really Missing?

This is Gracyn's second full week of kindergarten; you would have thought it was her first. By nature, she is highly sensitive, emotional, caring, and nurturing. However, this week, she exhibited those sweet and genuine qualities at a much higher level than what we are used to. Starting on Sunday evening, she began sobbing uncontrollably that she didn't want to go to school anymore. We calmed her down, but every morning and evening the tears started rolling again. Gracyn finally broke down and explained to Laura and I last night that she missed us during the day, she felt her brother and sister were having fun without her, that Laura was doing extracurricular events with Cannon and Anniston leaving her out, that she wasn't the leader all the time any more, etc. For those of you with kids, I can appreciate that most of you have experienced this previously.

I know that she'll get through this adjustment period, but it got me thinking. Gracyn felt so secure at home. Mom is here everyday showering her and her siblings with love and affection, teaching them life lessons and how to read, taking them outside to play and holding them when they scrape their knees. At school, Mom isn't around. Now, Gracyn didn't opt for kindergarten, it is required.

Don't we, though, relish that same warmth, compassion, comfort, and security when we are walking hand in hand with Christ? When we are "in sync" reading the scriptures, praying continuously, involved in church and small groups, striving to walk as did Jesus, we feel the warmth of God's spotlight on us. We sense His presence all around us and know we are being carried in His hands. Why then, do so many of us seem to then waver and drift out a ways? We know how good we have it, but does our flesh take over sometimes?

As a pharmaceutical rep, one of the medicines I used to have was a new drug for alcohol dependency. The drug worked to reduce cravings in a part of your brain. Doctors prescribed it like crazy for a year, but the company realized few refill prescriptions nationally. After conducting some market research with physicians, the company concluded that alcoholics were not refilling the prescription for two reasons. The first was that they just wanted to continue drinking. Not good candidates for treatment yet. The second reason was that so many had patients had been sober for a month, through their initial supply of pills, that they felt they had the disease conquered. They didn't associate being sober with the medicine, but as their own will.

I would submit that at times we feel so secure in Him and that we have things figured out, that we step out and venture a bit, confident in our own selves. Our minds wonder, at times, what we may be missing out on or see the"fun" others may be having without us. When in all actuality, our inner peace, security, and comfort has been fueled all along by staying right in the light.

When it gets a little cool in the shade, most of us step back in. If you have ever tried walking around at dusk after being in the bright sunshine all day, you notice that things get more difficult to make out and you stumble a bit. Likewise, after being in His light then taking a step out, it appears dusky. We may trip and stumble a little, but realize we see better in the light.

Spiritual journeys are difficult and full of obstacles themselves. The challenges are to enjoy being close to Him without the wonder of missing out, to never feel as if we've got it all figured out, and to appreciate the love and grace He showers on us regardless of where we stand.